Like in my life time, the changes in the world have been incredible. When I was a kid we had a rotary phone. We had a phone you had to stand next to, and you had to dial it. Do you realise how pimitive… you are making sparks…foo!.. in the phone. And you actually would hate people with zeroes in their numbers, ’cause it was more… It’s like, ‘Oh, this guy got two zeroes. Screw that guy! What do I wanna to…’ And then if they called and you weren’t at home the phone would just ring lonely by itself.
And then if you wanted money you had to go in the bank, when it was open for like three hours, stand in line, write some check like an idiot. And then when you ran out of money you’d just go, ‘Well, I can’t do any more things now’. I can’t do any more things. That was it.
Even if you had a credit card. The guy’d go, ‘Oh’, and he’d bring out this whole shunk-shunk, and he’d write… ‘I’ll call the president to see if you have any money’
— It’s all true, kids. You had to call the president. It was ridiculous. Do you feel that we now in the 21st century… we take technology for granted?
Well, yeah, ’cause now we live in an amazing, amazing world, and it’s wasted on the crappiest generation of just spoiled idiots. They don’t care! Because this is what people are like now. They got their phone and they’re like ‘Oh, it won’t…’ Give it a second!!! It’s going to space. Can you give it a second to get back from space? Is the speed of light too slow for you?
I was on an airplane and there was Internet, high-speed Internet on the airplane. That’s the newest thing that I know exists. And I’m sitting on the plane and they go, ‘Open up your laptop, you can go to Internet’. It’s fast and I’m watching YouTube clips. it’s amazing, I’m in an airplane. And then it breaks down. And they appologise the Internet is not working, and the guy next to me goes, ‘Pf, that’s bullshit!’ Like how quickly the world ows him something he new existed only ten seconds ago.
And on planes…
Flying is the worst one, because people come back from flights and they tell you their story. And it’s like a horror story. It’s they act like their flight was like the […] in the 40s in Germany. That how bad they make it sound. They’re like ‘It was the worst day of my life. First of all we didn’t board — for twenty minutes. And then we got on the plane and they made us sit there, on the runway, for forty minutes! We had to sit there…’
Or really what happened next — did you fly through the air, incredibly, like a bird? Did you partake in the miracle of human flight, you’re not contributing zero? That you got a flight… you’re flying!!! It’s amazing!
Everybody on every plane should just constantly be going, ‘Oh, my God!!! Wow!’ You fly. You’re sitting in the chair in the sky.
‘But it doesn’t go back a lot. And it’s not really…’
Here’s the thing. People like to say there are delays on flights. Delays, really? New York to California in five hours. They used to take thirty years to do that. And how about you would die on the way there and have a baby? You’ll be the whole different group of people by the time you got there. Now you watch a movie and take a dump in your home.